Showing posts with label rhyme. Show all posts
Showing posts with label rhyme. Show all posts

Aug 15, 2013

Mona Van Duyn’s “A Time of Bees”: Manly Men in Half-Rhyme


Mona Van Duyn’s “A Time of Bees”:  The Half-Rhyme of Men Being Men


A Time of Bees by Mona Van Duyn : The Poetry Foundation

“A Time of Bees” by Mona Van Duyn (1921–2004, our first female Poet Laureate) might seem daunting as we look at it on the page. Her lines are long; there are two pages of them, and maybe there’s something a little intimidating about stanzas that are consistently (rigidly?) five lines long. It’s a good time to practice what I’ve preached before:  look for small gifts along the way, in single images, or find in single lines the hints of larger ideas, even if we must wait to see if they ever expand and cohere. All the while we’re hoping the whole is worth our patience. (Ditto the length of my post).

It would also be easy to overlook Van Duyn’s use of form in “A Time of Bees.” I first noticed the uniformity of the five-line stanzas. Then I saw that quite a few of the line breaks, the enjambments, came at odd places (emphasizing some interesting meanings in individual lines, apart from their meanings in the poem as a whole). In a few lines, chosen randomly, I counted syllables and listened to stresses, but found no consistent pattern. Eventually, however, I saw the half-rhymes, in lines 1,3,5 and sometimes in lines 2 and 4. Some are so subtle, so “halved,” that we might call them eighteenth rhymes; but the rhyme becomes more definite as the poem goes along, and it’s reasonable to claim a rhyme scheme of ababa.
Sneaky Crawling

Why does this matter? Rhyme and meter can be merely decorative, and they often create comedy, as in limericks. To a poet, they can be as much a risk as a weapon. But in the hands of serious writers,  they suggest the poet’s tendency toward perceiving and valuing order in her subjects and her world view. A sense of music is another likely result of rhyme and meter, but not so much when the form is as understated as Van Duyn’s, where the rhyme is hanging by a thread.
Half-Rhyme?

So is she just a sloppy, half-hearted formalist? I don’t think so. The poem centers on the menacing but perhaps alluring way men tear things apart as they pursue a prey, an enemy, in order to repair and make things right and safe. Yes, that sounds a little pre-feminist, but in casual conversation, I’ve heard a number of intelligent women confess to finding muscle, sweat, labor and combat appealing. Some brainy women like seeing the torque of a man as he rips at things in order to fix them—to build, make, create. Isn’t that the end to which he’s been evolving?

And maybe the sweaty stuff becomes more appealing as technology evolves away from our need for physical labor on the home front. Let the robot do it. Or let the men, women and children from afar do it. For better or worse, our airplane drones even show the potential for an evolution away from physical combat.

Wouldn’t the law of supply and demand tell us that, as hunks thin out in the work force, giving way to I.T. guys and lab techs, the appeal and the price of hunks will grow more dear? I’d guess gym memberships are at an all-time high and will continue to grow, unless some dire upheaval returns us to an economy of agriculture and heavy industry.

Frontal
So, as Mona Van Duyn’s speaker watches her husband rip up part of their home in order to destroy an animal-enemy, she loves him. She embraces his animal nature as protector of the home as she watches it emerge. His tearing into things becomes almost a paradigm of the erotic.

But she’s not a dumb woman, and she’s aware that this is something like a double-edged sword. Shall she be cold and mechanical about being rid of the nuisance bees? Or shall she sympathize with an animal that was only doing what it was designed to do? She is so honest that she does both:

                        they writhe, some of them, but who cares?
                        They go to the garbage, it is over, everything has been said.

                        But there is more. Wouldn’t you think the bees had suffered
                        enough?
          
Love, labor and war make tenuous what she thought she thought—and valued. She’s a bit uncertain, so there is in Van Duyn’s poetic structure an air we might call tenuously formal—rhymes that almost challenge the definition of rhyme. And her clinging to a symmetrical five-line stanza gives way at the end to a single line that highlights a “grubby softness” that “wants to give, to give”—which is surely a reference to women as well as infant bees.
Such a world, such a mind, an experience such as this bee hunt, is surely not as neat and orderly as tidy, self-conscious, exact rhyme or meter would imply. Yet there is some kind of order in Van Duyn’s world of partially-evolved cave dwellers. If someone wants to call her rhymes crude, it’s all right because the world she’s presenting and accepting is also crude—in part. Eroticism is crude. Survival is crude. It’s about tearing things up to get to the bottom of things, where enemies live.

Still, the couple reads “books on bees” and later they bring home a scientist friend, for “they need/the idea of bees” (what an expression, by the way!). But in the end, understanding is secondary to elimination. There are only two forces: the squirming of bees with some life left in them and, with a remarkable adjective, the “unpleading” male’s need to kill them all, permanently, to protect home and hearth. 
There is nothing to plead about here; he is doing the necessary work.

Hiding Its Head in the . . . Sand?
Van Duyn denies us our penchant for simplistic dichotomies. She won’t let her gender, or any of us, say,  “I’m all brain, beauty, and spirit. I am not a savage. I am lofty. God made me in his image.”

To which Van Duyn calmly replies, “Don’t be silly. That sweaty, aggressive, murderous, rampaging, repairing man makes me aware of my own softness. I accept it. Maybe I even like it, and I’m honest enough to say so.”

“A Time of Bees” presents a rough-hewn, physical, even bestial world that continues to call to us, contain us, define us. It has a kind of order, but it’s a brutal order, and trying to prettify it with loud, exact rhymes or overly sweet music, would miss the point, would be a lie. 
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Apr 7, 2011

when serpents bargain by Edward Estlin Cummings

when serpents bargain by Edward Estlin Cummings



Natural Order and Harmony









Natural Chaos



Because I posted about the cummings poem last election eve, I foolishly thought I shouldn’t offer commentary about it again. Also, I was hurrying, and was very fixed on getting the Palin video clip up.

So let me add that I think cummings’ “when serpents bargain” is a satire, a work that holds up to ridicule some vice or folly (if that’s a direct quotation, I don’t recall the source—sorry). The target of cummings’ satire is our human, artificial, "unanimal" species, which has built myriad constructs (like unions and contracts) to deal with our competitive greed, envy, paranoia, and other base desires.

The poem's politics sound almost libertarian to me, which is odd coming a bohemian icon. Today’s Libertarians would probably call him a pink Communist fish and throw him back. But in fact, cummings’ Nature doesn't need human, artificial constructs like unions and negotiations. Thrushes (think robins) and owls just sing along together happily. It’s a choir out there, not a cacophony.

I like a lot of cummings, but this is a fool’s paradise, a poem that offers a childish, facile argument. Nature doesn't have unions because, in nature, the strong simply kill the weak; usually predators eat prey raw (because the prey did not unionize).

Yeah, that nature. Wake up, you romanticizing, idealizing songster.

However, and speaking of song, I am pleased and impressed that cummings, the wild, woolly, gentle old hippie, has set forth a well-constructed (yes, he constructed it, a very human thing to do, kind of the way birds build nests, fastidiously, purposefully) . . . a well-constructed good old-fashioned Shakespearean sonnet.

Moreover, his rhyming is quite pleasing—it’s not forced, and there are surprises, some genuine cleverness in “squirm . . . alarm,” “birch . . . march,” as well as both “their” and “saboteur.” All this is topped off with the odd, ingenious concluding stroke of half-rhyme in “incredible . . . until.”

One thing rhyme simply, inarguably does by its very nature, is to pull together the two rhyming words, at least briefly. It's a sensory, perhaps irrational phenomenon that invites us to consider some connection beyond the two words’ similar sounds.

This may or may not lead to some intriguing, additional ideas, but in skillful rhyming, we at least have a chance at more complicated thoughts than most love songs or nursery rhymes offer. For example, in “when serpents bargain,” we might “squirm” because we are “alarmed,” and one might fit that into the larger themes of the poem. Or maybe we’ll envision birch trees in March rather than June. Yes, this might be a stretch, but if we don't stretch some, we're rigid, immobile uninteresting. Yes, true, we must not force these associations, but if they turn out to be present, they create one more delight in a poem.



Well, here’s hoping I’ve just provoked more thought and discussion, rather than killing it with academic fog. Many a student has told me I'm crazy to look into such stuff so much (and here, I've only just begun). To me, analysis is neither an academic nor a psychotic obfuscation; it’s sunlight, a disinfectant. That probably means laying open still more viruses for others to examine. Is that a problem? Why?

I wonder if Christopher Smart would approve.

when serpents bargain by Edward Estlin Cummings

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Aug 12, 2010

Yeats and Olds Continued, The Bird Lady, "Adam's Curse"






Maybe everyone has met a bird lady at least once in a lifetime. In a way, the woman in the photo doesn’t exactly qualify because feeding the pigeon nation was a first for her. She kept repeating, “This is the coolest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.”

Cynics might urge her to get out of the house more, but I liked her delight in a simple pleasure. Pigeons are probably no one’s favorite animal, but the sheer numbers of greedy, gluttonous birds were impressive, and the woman became a girl again.

Then, behind me, I heard a gruff male voice, a stranger with a thick Brooklyn accent: “Those birds shit all over the place. Somebody oughta shoot ‘em all.”

“Shooting Pigeons in Brooklyn.” Sounds like a Mickey Spillane title. But that was the guy’s comment, and I wondered what I’d done to invite it.

There are certain kinds of tough-guy language and behavior that suck the joy right out of October blue and laughing children. Sometimes I worry about making such statements myself, just as I worry about being too sappy at the other end. Good writers have to walk that tightrope, among others, every time they put pen to paper. (By the way, I've just learned that Mickey Spillane briefly worked as a trapeze artist).

Somehow that’s the kind of decision I was asking for yesterday in comparing Sharon Olds’ “Sex without Love” to Yeats’ “When You Are Old.” Compared to honoring the Yeats, I can probably explain much more thoroughly what I like or respect about the Olds poem—its boldness and ingenuity in making serial sex a metaphor for our condition in the universe, its brazen repetition, its Oldsian decisions about line breaks, its mix of the trendy and the ontological, and on and on.

But “Sex with Love” also strikes me as a chunk of gravel shredding ancient parchment. Yeats and others have a feel for sacred documents; they know how to lay palms upon it, or gently unfurl it. I don’t know if Yeats could be crass if his life depended on it. But maybe that means he couldn’t be realistic either. He paid for that.

Perhaps it’s in this context that I offer Yeats’ “Adam’s Curse,” about work and beauty, poetry and love. The casual elegance of its language might cause readers to miss the fact that it’s written in rhymed couplets. Apparently the poet followed his own directions and labored so hard that we sense only the graciousness of his lines, not the labor that went into them. Isn’t that what he said he was going for, that illusion of naturalness? I wonder if he’s been to Brooklyn.



Adam’s Curse by William Butler Yeats : The Poetry Foundation [poem] : Find Poems and Poets. Discover Poetry.















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Lovers' Lane